Cannonball!
My father, aka The General, has nicknamed my daughter "Cannonball." She is so called for her propensity to jump into the deep end of the pool from the three meter board.
The General is ridiculously proud of her, seeing as her mother flatly refused to jump from the three meter board until she reached, oh, say, puberty. He walks about with his chest puffed out with grandpaternal pride, boasting to all that will listen of his wee intrepid daredevil of a granddaughter.
I, however, am now suffering from heart palpitations and the cold sweats. I'm having visions of bungee- and base-jumping, of hang-gliding and parachuting, of cave- and cliff-diving in remote locations. My nightmares now include telegrams from Borneo informing me of tragic accidents.
My heart! My nerves! My baby!
As my friend EN likes to say, at this point, I'm going to go indulge in a large spiritual beverage to calm my nerves. Fill the pool with tequila, y'all, 'cause I'm going to do a cannonball right into it.
The General is ridiculously proud of her, seeing as her mother flatly refused to jump from the three meter board until she reached, oh, say, puberty. He walks about with his chest puffed out with grandpaternal pride, boasting to all that will listen of his wee intrepid daredevil of a granddaughter.
I, however, am now suffering from heart palpitations and the cold sweats. I'm having visions of bungee- and base-jumping, of hang-gliding and parachuting, of cave- and cliff-diving in remote locations. My nightmares now include telegrams from Borneo informing me of tragic accidents.
My heart! My nerves! My baby!
As my friend EN likes to say, at this point, I'm going to go indulge in a large spiritual beverage to calm my nerves. Fill the pool with tequila, y'all, 'cause I'm going to do a cannonball right into it.
posted by Peevish McSnark at
11:10 PM
2 Comments:
Typical Americans with your swimming pools. We had to make do with inflatable paddling pools.
Hmmmph.
By
garfer, At
5:00 AM
My father has joined a community pool, complete with a separate kiddie pool and three diving boards.
Now, my brother-in-law actually does have an in-ground pool in his back yard. You'll find me there for an hour each afternoon, floating on a lilo, sunning myself like a frog on a lily pad. That, my friend, is the life.
By
Peevish McSnark, At
9:31 PM
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