Peevish

Friday, March 31, 2006

My favorite plant...

Sometimes, I really, really love my job.

Today I was grading essays in order to get caught up for the end of the marking period. I have to have grades in the computer on Tuesday. I wasn't too far behind, but I had an important assignment to grade that I had been putting off.

You see, the assignment was to design your ideal apartment. I provided the students with handouts that had an apartment layout and furniture already prepared. They were blank, of course, for the students to color, cut, and paste. I required each student, after they had done the arts & crafts portion of the project, to write an essay describing the arrangement of the furniture in the apartment. For example, "there is a yellow lamp on the little table next to the bed" (il y a une lampe jaune sur la petite table à côté du lit). Simple, right?

As I have students of varying abilities and interest levels, I got some fantastic essays with varied sentence structure, lots of excellent descriptive adjectives, and accurate spelling and accents. I also got a load of crap. I did, however, get one essay that made me giggle intermittently all afternoon.

This young man made his sofa (le canapé), easy chair (le fauteuil), and his plants (les plantes) green. Perfectly logical. No problem.

However, he misspelled green (vert or verte, depending on the gender of the noun) as "verge." I don't know how conversant most people are with this word, but it's a lovely slang term for a man's, ahem, member. So, in this essay, I had a dick sofa, a dick chair, and dick plants.

I don't know about you, but I quite fancy having a dick plant about. I imagine it would be kind of like a zucchini plant - you could let them go for a few days and harvest a couple the size of baseball bats. Just for the novelty, you understand. Gag gifts. No pun intended, really. Honest. heeee heee heeee. snicker, snort!

Perhaps they would more resemble trees, and would dangle down temptingly, just out of reach. It would be a nice change of pace, wouldn't it?

The kid got an A-, by the way.

8 Comments:

  • dick plant, what an innovative idea.
    :-)

    By Blogger Kyahgirl, At 3:25 PM  

  • An A- in courgettes?

    Way to go.

    By Blogger garfer, At 5:35 PM  

  • You know, its weird. My mom has made a living as a florist since I was a kid, yet I can't keep a dick plant alive to save my life.

    By Blogger portuguesa nova, At 2:32 PM  

  • I couldn't grow a dick plant,so it doesn't make a vas deferens.

    By Blogger S.I.D., At 6:47 PM  

  • I wondered the same thing Shiftclick did.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, At 6:57 PM  

  • Weeeellll, to answer Shifty's question, I just fixed his spelling and didn't tell him what it meant the way he'd spelled it. With 13 year old boys, there is such a thing as "too much information."

    SID - ouch. Puns really *are* the lowest form of humor. Very cute, though ;)

    By Blogger Peevish McSnark, At 10:01 PM  

  • Too cute!

    So...um...just where would I get the seeds for those plants? ;)

    By Blogger Stacy The Peanut Queen, At 9:10 AM  

  • A dick plant!

    *laughs*

    By Anonymous Anonymous, At 6:44 AM  

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